Forums Writing Chapter 5 Chapter 5: Bio + 3 Pitches

Chapter 5: Bio + 3 Pitches

Hi! I haven’t been active in a while so a bit nervous about jumping back in. Of course the bio was the hardest to write, but any and all feedback is appreciated. Thanks so much!

http://anniedg.matadoru.com/2012/10/23/chapter-5-story-pitches/

View Profile 2012-10-23 18:12:51 PDT

Enjoyed the Bio. Good job! I agree its a toughie to write but I think the beauty in a bio is that it can be static and change like we do as people.

Scott

View Profile 2012-10-23 21:13:03 PDT

Hey Annie,

Welcome back! Great bio. Bit too long, however. Perhaps omit the third sentence.

Pitch #1:

Absolutely loved this. Trim a sentence here and then for length’s sake. A great title for this would be something like, “Life as a gaper.” Had never hard that expression before.

Pitch #2:

Also a fantastic idea. I think you would need to approach this one with as much self-deprecating humour as possible, however. I’d cut down the opening paragraph, and include a funny anecdote about your own experiences. (Although the cult-like addition is dead on, and too funny.)

Pitch #3:

Also a great idea. Very interesting, very journalistic. This would definitely run as a “long-feature.” Therefore, you might want to include a line or two about how the format of this article would take shape. I’m having difficulty imagining how it’d look. Would you move back and forth between stories from your family and your personal experiences in Guatemala?

You’ll do just fine, Annie.

CW

View Profile 2012-10-24 17:53:15 PDT

Thanks so much, I really appreciate the feedback. I’ve made edits based on your comments and think it sounds better now. The third pitch will take some research and largely depend on what I can find when visiting, but I intend to write it before pitching.

Thanks again!

View Profile 2012-11-09 21:49:14 PST